Wednesday, January 18, 2012

One Of Our Fish Died...Sort Of

I'll spare you pictures. Needless to say he was paralyzed and occasionally "breathing"...and I noticed it and pointed it out to my husband. He flushed it down the toilet (still slightly alive but what are you going to do?).
So- like any hyperemotional pregnant mommy 6 weeks-ish from giving birth I burst into tears.
I don't have this crazy deep complex over this stuff normally, though I am somewhat emotionally sensitive. I think that it triggered a few unpleasant memories in the past. I don't know if I ever actually blogged about this because for some reason I couldn't find the post but when I miscarried our 3rd little one at 9 weeks...I hurriedly flushed the remains down the umm...flushing things down the toilet isn't so easy. Even mostly-dead goldfish. Yeah, I know you probably didn't see that coming but I just thought I'd throw that out there.
It's something a piece of my heart will always be healing a bit more from-and that is ok.
So little goldfish with your beautifully long tail (who was an abandoned fish from the pet store whom my husband brought home). I know you were just a fish. God made you. You didn't have a soul. I wasn't attached to you. But I cried when you got flushed. RIP.

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