Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Choosing To Be Still

Be Still
Stephen Curtis Chapman

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is holy
Be still, O restless soul of mine
Bow before the Prince of peace
Let the noise and clamor cease

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is faithful
Consider all that He has done
Stand in awe and be amazed
And know that He will never change
Be still

Be still, and know that He is God
Be still, and know that He is God
Be still, and know that He is God

Be still; Be speechless

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know He is our Father
Come rest your head upon His breast
Listen to the rhythm of His unfailing heart of love
Beating for His little ones
Calling each of us to come
Be still, Be stil

        Today Eoin came into the living room halfway through his normal resting time and just wanted to cuddle and fall asleep in my arms again. This song came to mind as I layed him down on our little couch wrapped up in a quilt my mother-in-law handmade my husband when he was little. It now wraps its worn soft comfort around my son as he sleeps peacefully, his heart at rest.
       No one would know looking at this that on Friday morning he went from a deep slumber into a full seizure...his small two-year-old body convulsing and clenched uncontrollably in silent shudders. He seems just fine now, thank the Lord, but it sent terror into my heart and my husband's as we drove him to the hospital, leaving Imogen with my mother that Friday morning. The doctors ran the usual tests and could find nothing wrong...basically saying this one is a "freebie"...hoping he doesn't have another one. If he does, that means more searching.
       For now we trust in a Lord Who knows all things, and still takes such tender care of us. Through loss, through fear, through pain through joys and beauty abounding...He is still the same God. He is good. I choose to trust this truth, even when my heart and my spirit fail me.
       I think I will use this post to remind me next time I am prone to respond angrily or lash out in my selfish want for instant gratification through frustration, anger or impatience. Lord cultivate within me a gracious, quiet, passionate and tender heart for my husband, my children, my world and You, my God.
      May I be reminded to rest and move and breathe and exist in the love, goodness, justice and power of the Father who knows this trembling cracked sistern of a heart. I will trust that He will make us whole again.
Be Still.

           What helps you cultivate a genuine heart of graciousness and gentleness with your children and your husband?
           What keeps you from being still before the Lord and trusting His goodness?
           How can we remedy this?

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